Nearly a month without him :(

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Sean was a gorgeous boyfriend who for 3 years stood by me...

In December/January/February i had a mental breakdown. It was a horrible time for everyone involved, but we came through it and i went on medication. End of April i suffered another minor setback , my meds needed to be adjusted.. but that setback pushed Sean too far and he could no longer cope with me or my illness.

I KNOW being with someone with mental health problems is fucking hard.. i never said it would be easy - but i HONESTLY thought he'd never ever leave me *because he said he wouldn't*. However, the breakdown proved too much.

99% of the time, i believed and still DO believe we were happy. We laughed ALL the time.. I ALWAYS made him laugh... We went places i never ever thought i would be able to go to... He HELPED me and encouraged me to do that... He was amazing in that respect...and i will love him FOREVER for helping me.

For the first time since 1996 last year i went on HOLIDAY - we had a lovely time and again, without his help and support that would never have happened. We weren't unhappy... We were very happy... Sometimes things get too much for the strongest of people.

Sean was amazing and he was everything to me... I love him dearly and getting over our relationship is so very hard because of everything we went through together...

He is NOT a bad person.. he just couldn't cope with ME anymore...

Comments

Timilee said…
break ups are always hard. Regardless of mental illness or whatever issues. The part that you have to realize to yourself is that YOU did all those things. You mentioned it in your vlog. You did all that. Not him. Getting over someone one you deeply love is no easy feat. But in time it will get easier. Have faith, that maybe this relationship was to show you just how strong you really are. And to help prepare you for a relationship that is even better, where you will take even bigger steps to wellness. Breakups take two people... two. Its not all your fault and to blame yourself solely is absurd. If anything I have learned in my life, is that some things are your choice, but when it comes to relationships, it takes two to tango. Keep on keeping on and keep your head up. xoxo
30/05/2012, 04:37
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