Santa Pod..
My boy, his daddy and the "other" family are all off to SANTA POD this weekend. How exciting!! Stinky is car mad. He knows all cars, their makes, models, date of manufacture...everything, so going to there is going to be amazing for him :)
Comments
I first found your blog and started lurking shortly before you met your boyfriend. I was pretty bad at the time and yours was the first agoraphobia blog I found. It was so nice to read that someone else understood totally what I was going through (but at the same time sad because I don't want anyone else to ever have to suffer panic and agoraphobia).
I love that you've come such a long way. It gives me hope for the future. I too have come a long way since being almost housebound for a few months, but have yet to venture out camping or to a cinema. The beach I can do, walking is a struggle. I feel I may get trapped where I can't be if I'm on foot. But how far you've come is an inspiration and I hope that you keep improving at the rate you have been.
Finally, don't apologise for how you look without makeup! You look wonderful without makeup (and I love your jammies too! I want some!).
xxx
It's really good news that you're also improving. It is such a slow process that simply cannot be rushed, especially after being housebound.
I don't know why (like you) walking is an issue. This is going to sound strange, but i can't do an A to B journey on foot if it's a great distance, but i can walk round the shops for hours.
I will get better and so will you... :)
Thank you for reading...
x
my main anxieties are going to family events,wedding christenings party's etc i can just never do it,i cant eat or drink when i'm out and in the house find it hard enough,my fella cant watch me,he understands and we do everything together aswell cos he's my best friend which is nice,sounds like ur boyfriend is very understanding too so it must be really hard about the commitment thing as he seems a nice chap ;0)
i can go out but only with my falla by my side,and if we need to leave a shopping centre or anything then he will also come right home with me,we both dont drive but he is hoping to learn at sum point so getting onto busses can be a bit weird for me too,and omg the dentist freaks me out so i have to go to a special one and have gas and air lol and i dont even go to that unless i'm in major pain,dont like dr's either or going to see them or waiting in waiting rooms for appointments when they are running late,it sounds weird but i get freaked out by little noises like if the raidiator at home makes a noise or the floor board creaks then i jump out my skin and my heart sinks to my belly lol,i dont answer the door or phone and i live in my pj's most of the time too,anyway thought i'd just tell u a bit more bout myself,glad u have gained the trust of ur boyfriend after being treated bad by ur ex ;0(
and ur mum sounds very supportive too,its good that u have the confidence to do these video's aswell cos i'm sure they help loads of people like myself included,its nice to know ur not alone and lots of people go through the same thing so thanks xxxx
My fella is fab and so very supportive, that's the only reason i have got better.
I can't go anywhere alone, i walk to the end of the road, but thats about it. If i need to leave, then my boyfriend will bring me home, no questions asked.
You're SO brave doing public transport, i couldn't do that, not for a million pound!!!! I didn't go to a dentist until i nearly died through pain. THEN they had to sedate me with IV drugs. Doctors/waiting i am fine with (now).
Because i am home most nights/days alone, i have learnt to understand the noises around my house. If i hear something downstair, i am straight down there, like i am fearless, goodness knows what would happen if someone was there..lol.
I have a spyhole so i answer the door to who i want. Phonecalls the same. PJ's yep, love 'em. If i'm not going anywhere or seeing anyone, i won't change out of mine until bathtime.
I don't completely trust my boyfriend, just because without commitment he could just fuck off, that easily, like he did last year. I'm MY head and MY world, once someone commits to you, that is SUPPOSED to me, they will be there for you regardless, and i am surprised i am writing this after being hurt so badly by my HUSBAND, who MARRIED ME and still left!!!
My mother has supported me 100% through the whole thing, sometimes she comes out with some shit, that can hurt me, but i suck it up and move on.
I do my videos for me mostly, so i have a record of where i'm at. I would like to think they help someone. I get a lot of positive feedback in my inbox, so that's nice.
I'm glad you enjoy them...
x