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I hate ME on days like today.

We had it all planned out yesterday what we were going to do. I managed an hour. My bad head is spinning, so dizzy it's untrue. I feel like when i walk the ground is coming up to meet me. Bloody horrible. I've taken medication but to now, no different, in fact, i am beginning to feel really nauseaous.

I feel like the worlds worst girlfriend. It's a big fail for today. I look and feel like shit. The black circles under my eyes are terrible, i look like a heroin user. My skin has broken out, i'm tired and i wish i wasn't here.

So...i'm home alone while my boyfriend and son have gone out. I did treat them both to a full English breakie this morning though...

...however....I hate myself. I hate myself for feeling ill, for being ill, for having no control over this stupid illness.

Comments

Shelly said…
damn. I hope you feel better soon. I am somewhat in shitty lace myself.

I guess we have to just have to hang in there.

xoxo
09/08/2010, 18:58
Sarah♥ said…
Hi...I hope you're okay hun. Xxx
09/08/2010, 19:05
em said…
dont take things out on yourself. you have an illness, you have no control over your body and what it does. the beginning of ehlers, i too experienced the floor moving when i walked, the dizziness, nausea. i tried some anti-nausea meds at first nothing seemed to work, so i stopped. now im on domperidone a cheap tablet(trust me to tolerate cheap!), which does the trick. hope you feel better soon. x
09/08/2010, 19:14
Sarah♥ said…
It's just another blow. If having agoraphobia isn't enough for my boyfriend to tolerate, another obstacle is thrown our way!!!
09/08/2010, 19:55
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