CLOSURE. THE END!!!!!
Where it all started... Say Hi and Goodbye to my EX HUSBAND. This is the precious man that i loved for all those years but who treated me like dog shite... I'm only really posting these pictures because i LOVE LOVE LOVE my wedding dress. It was EXACTLY what i wanted. Gorgeous...stunning...i still love it now, rammed upstairs in the loft, screwed up in a ball somewhere :) Don't i look happy? Unfortunately by the end of the day, i was crying!
Comments
think the group is a really good idea to help people with different mental health issues as it seems to cover most of them,can i ask you one question? have you learnt how to control ur panic attacks as i have not found anything that works,when it happens my heart races,i sweat,my hands and head shake,feel like i'm gonna be sick,faint,die or something silly and i can't breath or get my breath at all,ive tried taking deep breaths but does not work just makes me more dizzy,my fella tries to make me laugh or change the subject but does not work as i bite his head off lol,try thinking of other things but just can't seem to be able to get my mind from my panic,tried breathing into paper bag but doesn't work and u look stupid ha ha,tried running from the situation and avoidance and yes that does work but i can't do that for the rest of my life,what do you do when u have one but you know uve gotta go through with something? thanks so much if you can give any pointers xxx
Let me try and explain the best i can in words how i feel when a panic attack is coming on. The first feeling is like a stomach churn as if you're on a rollercoaster, then i get what i can only describe is as the adrenaline release which in turn makes me feel sick, shaky, breathless, like i'm suffocating, that i'm going fucking nutso...seriously losing my mind and if i go a step further i WILL loose my mind/throw up/die. I can't even tell you my name when i'm panicking let alone trying to rationalise the situation. My mind is purely focused on how bad i feel...
When my boyfriend picked me up from my mums the other day, a journey i have done with him loads of times, i felt really anxious, teetering on the edge of a panic attack. He told me on the way home that we'd have to stop at his, which made me feel worse. Driving down A ONE WAY SYSTEM i started getting sensations that a panic attack was looming, but something clicked in my head that i couldn't panic because we're on a one way street and i can't go anywhere but forward - so that's all i could do.
When panic hits out of the blue, it's hard. If it happens i do still remove myself from that situation, but now i make sure i go back to that very place the next day and finish off what i was intending before i panicked.
Basically, i got with my boyfriend who seems to understand what i go through so it makes me feel instantly at ease, that is what has helped me. NOT feeling under any pressure at all to 'perform' like i use to with my ex. If i can't do something i don't do it, if i can, then i will - simple as that :)
x
Your fella loves you. He's still with you isn't he, that's love and shows he doesn't care about your illness, he's in it for the long run.
When i got married (both times) i was really panicky. First time i had a panic attack on the steps..saying i couldn't go in...but i did. A registry office wedding would take minutes...that's all :)
x
yes waiting really winds me up,i know i should expect it in the dr's by now but i still get angry lol,got to do to the dr's on tues so hope she's on time cos very nervous already.yes he loves me to bits and does everything for me and really understands,i just don't know what he's doing wiv me half the time as he's dead nice and could have anybody he wanted ;0)
so yeah i feel lucky in that way which is nice. weather has been crappy here pouring down again,have a nice evening hun
love and hugs from vin xxx