What i hate is not being able to tell people how i really feel without feeling guilty for moaning. My mother STILL doesn't know how much i hate myself, and if i try and tell my boyfriend he will constantly remind me of how there are people who are much worse off than me (WHICH I DO, I REALLY DO UNDERSTAND), but what i feel, day in, day out - it's fucking soul destroying.
Sitting here today, not knowing what to do with myself. I feel ill. I am tired. I just want to be normal and well....
I want to cry it out to someone who really understands and cares about me...and i can't do that. I am so down and i don't know what to do about it.
I wish i felt better. Please, If there is a God out there - help me. I really need help.
I'm crying into my pillow so my wonderful little man doesn't hear me...
Sitting here today, not knowing what to do with myself. I feel ill. I am tired. I just want to be normal and well....
I want to cry it out to someone who really understands and cares about me...and i can't do that. I am so down and i don't know what to do about it.
I wish i felt better. Please, If there is a God out there - help me. I really need help.
I'm crying into my pillow so my wonderful little man doesn't hear me...
Comments
Inside I'm crying for help too and having to accept that nobody will or can. Just having the strength to write how you feel is so hard - you ARE strong!! Keeping all this to yourself each day proves how much.
((HUGS)) x
Hope you're okay beautiful one (and you ARE beautiful) xxxx