Why am i depressed this time?

-
Love. Not having real love. Not having someone who cares enough about me to put the fucking bottle down. Not having someone who is there for me, everyday..., instead, being too pissed to drive and isn't available or dependable. Someone who wants to make a future with me and it not being just a temporary thing. Someone who doesn't lie. Someone who really understands my problems and not just 'playing the part' of someone who does. I want to be a priority and not last on the list... I want to be made to feel special and loved. I want a RELATIONSHIP......

I want someone to love me, as much as i love them.
I want the fairy tale.

Comments

Miss F said…
You will find your fairytale, it takes a very long time, but you can find it. I remember when me and Mr F met, its was the wrost start ever and i can honestly say we hated each other, but things can change too and get better xx
24/11/2011, 20:38
Throat said…
This depressed posting, completely useful..
25/11/2011, 23:29
Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

CLOSURE. THE END!!!!!

-
Image
Where it all started... Say Hi and Goodbye to my EX HUSBAND. This is the precious man that i loved for all those years but who treated me like dog shite... I'm only really posting these pictures because i LOVE LOVE LOVE my wedding dress. It was EXACTLY what i wanted. Gorgeous...stunning...i still love it now, rammed upstairs in the loft, screwed up in a ball somewhere :) Don't i look happy? Unfortunately by the end of the day, i was crying!
Read more

From the mouth of an EX agoraphobic

-
A friend of mine yesterday pointed out what a person had written on their blog about being agoraphobic. Said person is an EX agoraphobic...this is what was said. "Agoraphobia is a selfish state of mind. Its completely "curable", and yet some people just wallow in their own self-pity and will never ever get over themselves and recover. When you are so worried about yourself all the time, how can you possibly be a good mother to someone else? Or a good wife/girlfriend/friend? I've unfortunately been the agoraphobic, and I've been the agoraphobics friend. As the friend, it was miserable. Nothing was ever about anything else but them. It was annoying and frustrating. And completely in their hands to change it, but they wouldn't. Because they're too selfish and self centered. Those aren't qualities people like in a person." Opinions please?
Read more

It DID get worse..

-
Image
...now there's a shocker! I have spent the entire evening in hospital. We had to call an ambulance, these feelings in my heart were insane. I was sat in the back on the ambulance and they did all my obs. I was tachycardic, my BP was really high (usually its stupid low) and my ECG was showing Atrial fibrillation, meaning the top two chambers of my heart are beating faster than the bottom two. I was put on oxygen as well because my breathing was a little bit crappy. The medic man stuck a candular in my hand and hit a valve apparently, my hand swelled up in seconds, it was so painful. Got to the hospital and did all the necessary things and then we had to wait...and wait...and wait. Where they'd stuck that needle in the back of my hand and hit the valve, it started going dead. I couldn't feel 4 of my fingers! I called to get someone to take the bugger out. I'm left with a lovely bit blue bruise this morning. My step-father was called to pick us up because we thoug...
Read more